there's a battle ahead, many battles are lost...
and i have to laugh, my buddy up in Madison called (only got a message, missed him, dammit), how ya doing, leaving the country for the holidays, that kind of thing. and i couldn't resist leaving the message back (apparently already flew out) that i saw how WI is already buried under at least 8" of snow, and while it may be a light rain here, it's also 65 and i have the windows open. hahahahaha.
it really is the little things.
*
so i accomplished nothing that i wanted to do these last two days, but i did get shit done. did some shopping (food!), have nearly killed off the ants (getting some spray from work tomorrow that should finish them off), cleaned the bath, most of the kitchen, and even cleared off the never used (but overflowing with mail) dining table.
i'm minorly stressing about xmas with my uncle and family. i'm not sure about which of my cousins' families will be there, but i want to get something small and appreciated for all of them but am clueless. the last time i got anything for this side of my family it was 2001 and i was on good terms with everyone. i haven't seen either cousin since then and only saw my aunt and uncle for the first time last June when i stayed over after my interview for Charlotte.
i almost wish i could just find the time to go up and spend it with my sister and her family, because they are unassuming and, well, just people. i spent an xmas with them back in...2003, maybe? can't recall, the early years and the middle years of this decade have blurred together thanks to the number of cities, circumstances, and debacles in which i've found myself.
don't get me wrong, i love all sides of my family, it's just that they seem radically different at times (and especially given history). my two cousins' weddings in the late '90s were the best of the decade (how many of you have helped your uncle build a hoopa for his daughter's mixed denom wedding?) but contact has been sparce since, well, like i said, holidaze 2001.
*
i am still yet to make good on my promise to myself that i would find a decent psych by my birthday. had a few sessions with a couple different ones but am yet to find a solid connection with any of them. and, dear God, draining the $$$ like this is not helping. i need to find a way to transport my counselor from 2002 here. now.
*
it never ceases to amaze me that we know all the signs and signals (seriously, what kind of depraved individual are you if you dont anymore) that point to some sever level of depression. i dont really know whats going on half the time, and the other half i dont care.
ok. i was going to erase that, but then i realized that i care about certain things, like work, my staff, family (most of them), and then all this other crap flooded my head.
i guess i just need to ask our in house psych (who only works on saturday) for a decent list of reccomendations, and then do the worst thing possible and ask her out.
it really is the little things.
*
so i accomplished nothing that i wanted to do these last two days, but i did get shit done. did some shopping (food!), have nearly killed off the ants (getting some spray from work tomorrow that should finish them off), cleaned the bath, most of the kitchen, and even cleared off the never used (but overflowing with mail) dining table.
i'm minorly stressing about xmas with my uncle and family. i'm not sure about which of my cousins' families will be there, but i want to get something small and appreciated for all of them but am clueless. the last time i got anything for this side of my family it was 2001 and i was on good terms with everyone. i haven't seen either cousin since then and only saw my aunt and uncle for the first time last June when i stayed over after my interview for Charlotte.
i almost wish i could just find the time to go up and spend it with my sister and her family, because they are unassuming and, well, just people. i spent an xmas with them back in...2003, maybe? can't recall, the early years and the middle years of this decade have blurred together thanks to the number of cities, circumstances, and debacles in which i've found myself.
don't get me wrong, i love all sides of my family, it's just that they seem radically different at times (and especially given history). my two cousins' weddings in the late '90s were the best of the decade (how many of you have helped your uncle build a hoopa for his daughter's mixed denom wedding?) but contact has been sparce since, well, like i said, holidaze 2001.
*
i am still yet to make good on my promise to myself that i would find a decent psych by my birthday. had a few sessions with a couple different ones but am yet to find a solid connection with any of them. and, dear God, draining the $$$ like this is not helping. i need to find a way to transport my counselor from 2002 here. now.
*
it never ceases to amaze me that we know all the signs and signals (seriously, what kind of depraved individual are you if you dont anymore) that point to some sever level of depression. i dont really know whats going on half the time, and the other half i dont care.
ok. i was going to erase that, but then i realized that i care about certain things, like work, my staff, family (most of them), and then all this other crap flooded my head.
i guess i just need to ask our in house psych (who only works on saturday) for a decent list of reccomendations, and then do the worst thing possible and ask her out.
posted by jersn at 1:41 AM
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