fourth of july

so that's today's memory lane/with all the pathos and pain

*

When I was a kid, I would ride my ten speed down to Mound Street, the edge of Capitol University campus, to watch the parade on the fourth.  I remember doing it for a few years with my family, because we all wanted to see my sister in the marching band.  After she graduated, it seemed I was the only one still going every year, and then, I remember midway through the parade when I was 12 (I think) I thought, "Geez, I've seen this all every single year, and all that's changed is the faces".

*

I think I watched the Macy's Turkey Day parade once when with a bunch of friends in 2002.  Or 2003.  I know I was drunk.

*

another chapter in a book where the chapters are endless

*

In a different life I listened to this album when it came out, and ever since then.

I'm happy I didn't, though.  When there is nothing going on in your life aside from work and just getting by, you make these stupid comparisons that hold no value whatsoever.  Comparing absolutes is mindbogglingly stupid, at least in my experience.  Yet for whatever reason I still end up doing it.

Mainly because I have nothing going on aside from work, and the random phone calls from friends that are hundreds of miles away.  Friends who are randomly doing ok, going through another round of chemo, having surgery, suffering a stroke, or dealing with divorce.

It's pretty sad when I'm the one who is doing the best out of this lot.  And aside from tooth issues, I'm a prime catch, ladies...where ya at?

*

what a waste of gunpowder and sky

*

Maybe I need to fall asleep to a book for once, rather than the glowing screen.  Or with a nice woman.  God, it's been a while.

I type this and all I can think of is random afternoons with N when I was still living in Pittsburgh, random early summer afternoons and all the world is happening around us but we don't give a damn, because we're happy to be with each other.

And she would turn to me...one more time...