started hummin' a song from 1962
ain't it funny how the night moves.
*
i feel lost sometimes, aimless simply because I work and then what? I threw Boswells Life of Johnson in with the stack of books that I brought with me and I still have yet to crack the spin of a book that I bought ten years ago. in a city i haven't lived in for the same amount of time.
i actually want to get out, go out, do something, but i'm not strong. i'm weak, i can't focus, and i'm mired in the past and especially work. these are excuses i know but i'm afraid. i'm afraid of taking this kitchen over, of moving into a new life, of moving on. of asking that one server out, because she's cute and fun, but really because she has a ph.d in psychology. she knows no one, has spent the last ten years in school with no life, and we're both starting from square one.
i don't know.
*
with autumn closing in...
*
i feel lost sometimes, aimless simply because I work and then what? I threw Boswells Life of Johnson in with the stack of books that I brought with me and I still have yet to crack the spin of a book that I bought ten years ago. in a city i haven't lived in for the same amount of time.
i actually want to get out, go out, do something, but i'm not strong. i'm weak, i can't focus, and i'm mired in the past and especially work. these are excuses i know but i'm afraid. i'm afraid of taking this kitchen over, of moving into a new life, of moving on. of asking that one server out, because she's cute and fun, but really because she has a ph.d in psychology. she knows no one, has spent the last ten years in school with no life, and we're both starting from square one.
i don't know.
*
with autumn closing in...
posted by jersn at 10:47 PM
1 Comments:
and it still hurts, not the dull opressive weight on my chest anymore but that lacking, that need for someone else. i almost made it a month with no contact from the ex, but she ruined it last week. fuck.
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